PENTECOSTALS: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
CHARISMATIC: Only one. Hands already in the air.
PRESBYTERIANS: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
ROMAN CATHOLIC: None. Candles only.
BAPTISTS: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
EPISCOPALIANS: Eight. One to call the electrician, and seven to say how much they liked the old one better.
METHODISTS: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved – you can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Churchwide lighting service is planned for Sunday, October 14. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.
NAZARENE: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
LUTHERANS: None. Lutherans don’t believe in change.
AMISH: What’s a light bulb?
